Last Thanksgiving, Caroline and I had plans for a road trip that would take us on one of our favorite drives, up the California coast from San Luis Obispo to Monterey. On Highway 1, we would meander the curves, stop to gaze upon the surf, and break out a Tofurky with the Elephant Seals near San Simeon.
Well, the day we are getting ready to leave, I finally decide to read the instructions for the Tofurky I’m about to throw into the ice-chest. What, I have to let this thing thaw for 24 hours and then bake it for 2 hours? Oh well, so much for a traditional Thanksgiving dinner, we will have to compromise, so I throw the Tofurky back in the freezer, and that is where it has sat since last year.
Of course, it is still good; this lump of Tofu is good for more miles than a good set of tires or until July 2007, whichever comes first. This time, I’m prepared and whip that plastic bird out of the freezer a good 24 hours in advance. Finally, the moment is upon us, I stoke the fire in the hearth and get ready to, to, well, to take my stuffed Tofurky and simply put it in the oven.
With some carrots, potatoes, onions, and some leftover cauliflower that shouldn’t be baked for two hours, the Tofurky is placed in a large casserole dish and covered with the recommended basting sauce of orange juice, soy sauce, and a sweetener. I actually used orange juice, tamari, and honey – to be honest, I do not know what it really added to the Tofurky. One hundred minutes later, I prepared the rest of the provisions that would accompany our unorthodox Thanksgiving meal.
Mmmm, the Brussels sprouts are turning out great, as is the asparagus. The dumplings that came with the Tofurky are in the boiling water, and the gravy is simmering. As the dumplings begin to float, the dinner is ready to be served. It is out of the oven and actually smells pretty good. The Tofurky looks much the way it did when it went in.
I pull out the carving knife to perform the honors, and the magic veggie turkey is loaded with a secret chamber packed full of stuffing. Great, this is like a special American holiday version of the Kinder Egg! I hesitate to try to build something out of the stuffing instead of proceeding to bring this meal together and find out what a Tofurky tastes like.
First of all, don’t think of this Tofurky as a giant drumstick and chomp off a giant mouthful, you may not ever finish chewing before you decide to attempt a world record try for the largest single swallow of a solid object, and don’t forget the gravy. While I may have made light of this adventure, it turns out that Tofurky isn’t half bad. As a matter of fact, as I made smaller cuts of the Tofurky and ate it with some of the stuffing and gravy, it was quite ok.
The texture is not very familiar. It is not like tofu, nor is it like meat. The large bite was a bit rubbery, but the smaller portions were adequate at hinting that you might be eating turkey. With gravy and stuffing, you are right there, just close your eyes and don’t think very hard about it. The taste is turkeyish, well, I think it is. Being months after Thanksgiving and even longer since I actually ate some turkey, I suppose my taste buds are rusty at being an accurate specialist as to the true flavor of what the old gobbler tastes like.
Would I eat it again? Yes, I would. Although I am a meat eater, this Tofurky while it is probably the butt of many a joke, is pretty good. One taste will not win over the avid turkey eater, but come next Thanksgiving, if we find ourselves out on the road, I wouldn’t hesitate to bring along a Tofurky with us. I probably shouldn’t commit to this yet, as I haven’t warmed the leftovers yet and don’t yet know how well this revived from the cold of the refrigerator.
Oh yeah, those dumplings that come with the Tofurky. Do not cook them, they are a waste of the energy required to take them out of the deep freeze. Send them back to the manufacturer as a revolt against them being packaged as fit for human consumption. Compared to dumplings, Tofurky is a three-star dish.
